The ABC’s To Get Degrees (Part 1)

Seeing that I have now been in college for a total of two and a half years, obviously I am the most intelligent twenty year old Iowa has ever seen. While choosing my adventure at Iowa State I have learned many things about myself and others here at this below average educational institution. However, out of all of the things that I have learned here at Iowa State, one thing stands out more than anything.

 

The alphabet.

this could be us but you’re playing.

A, B, C, and good ol’ D are just a few of the fantastic letters found in the English language as I have been told in college. Now, unlike the classic alphabet that I learned to love via song in preschool, the college alphabet is a bit different. Each of the twenty-six letters hold a different lesson that I have learned, now I will be sharing my knowledge with you all:

*disclaimer* When I started writing this post I thought that I would be able to analyze all of the letters of the alphabet in one post. I was wrong. I have a short attention span. You have a short attention spam. So I am splitting up these posts four letters at a time.

A – Acceptable Alcoholism: Unlike that Uncle or Aunt that was always drunk at family events that ultimately scared you for life when they started making out on top of the turkey or that time in high school you thought it was a good idea to mix a little bit of everything in your parents liquor cabinet until you started puking your guts out in your best friends toilet, alcohol was always an interesting, sort of taboo substance for me up until college. Once I got to college, everyone was drinking. In fact, I’ve noticed that it is more common to be intoxicated than it is to be sober; it’s even celebrated. Parties during weeknights, using alcohol as a way to express yourself, and bar specials during the week are some of the most common social interactions you experience in college. However, once you graduate it’s no longer a joke to say “LOL WOW I’M SUCH AN ALCOHOLIC LOL LOOK AT ME GOooOooOooO CHUG CHUG” it’s just sad and next thing you know you’re making out with someone on a turkey at your family’s Thanksgiving feast. Oh Aunty Poof you’re such a mess.

 

*disclaimer* If you are in college and don’t like alcohol and don’t like being drunk good for you. Honestly you probably will succeed in life a lot more than the rest of us.

 

B – Boners: Now ladies and gentlemen, boners are a very high form of praise and in a way they are also kind of funny. A word of advice, don’t laugh at a boner. Rumor has it the male will get insecure and the boner will go away and it will be a little awkward.

 

Or so I’ve heard.

 

C – Crying: My very first day at Iowa State two and a half years ago, I saw three separate people on campus crying. It wasn’t just tears either, they were having full on Britney Spears circa (more like circus amiright?) (cause she sings a song called circus…?) (get it….?) (i’m not funny why are you even reading this blog at all you must be really bored) 2007 meltdown. I remember thinking how odd that was. I hated crying at the time. I didn’t get it.

 

Two and a half years later, I understand them more than anyone. I don’t think there has been a week in the past year that I haven’t cried about something, mostly just because of all of the pent up feelings and repressed memories I’ve had for the majority of my life on top of all the stress that comes with college and living in your early twenties. In a way it’s kinda like puberty round two. I remember once over the summer I cried because I couldn’t eat a chicken strip.

 

A chicken strip.

 

I cried because of a chicken strip.

 

College.

 

D – Debt: An in state student? An out of state student? Scholarships? Loans? These are things that I thought would make a difference in the amount of money I would have to spend as a student. At the end of the day though, it really doesn’t matter. I don’t think I have met a single student at Iowa State paying for their own education who will not be graduating with some sort of debt. Let’s just say I’ve had about 1924723905239 rants about this since I even applied to college so I will save you all the five paragraph essay that my college education has taught me how to formulate for only 9,600 dollars a semester.

 

Obviously I’m not bitter.
No not at all.

Now you know your college A, B, C’s, next time won’t you cry with me.

Hello…It’s Me. (Adele Please Don’t Sue Me).

After looking through some of my old blog posts I noticed a common trend. The last few posts have begun with me apologizing for not writing as much as I used to in high school. Now, here’s the thing about college: there are a lot more things for me to do on a daily basis than when I was in high school. Some of these exciting college things include:

 

• Signing checks and paying bills.
• Experimenting with alcoholism.
• Crying.
• Going to class (at least thinking about going to class).
• Socializing…?
• Crying.
• Looking for big girl jobs upon graduation.
• School work.
• Work work.
• Crying at work.
• Working out.
• Dealing with crippling anxiety.
• Grocery shopping.

 

Now obviously, a lot of these things go hand and hand. What college student hasn’t just started crying randomly in the middle of class because they all of a sudden realize that their entire life has been structured by educational institutions since they entered preschool and in a few short years they will truly be on there own for the first time in their lives?

 

No?

 

Just me?

 

Yeah I’m not that surprised. Most of my meetings with my psychiatrist start with him asking me what the “problem of the month” is. As a side note is it sad that I am now on a first name basis with my psychiatrist? Actually no don’t answer that, let’s save the problem of the month for something more important.

 

In two days it will officially be one year since I have posted on this blog. Honestly I’m surprised I even remember the password. In the past year I’ve hit a lot of milestones, both good and bad, but important nonetheless. I’ve discovered a lot about myself both mentally and emotionally, I’m in the best physical shape I have been in in years, I experienced my first heartbreak, I’ve held down a job for almost two years now, and I’m learning that it’s ok that I won’t always know everything. I’ve realized that I can trust more people than I ever did before, and I’ve also realized that it’s ok to let people go even if you used to care about them more than anyone.

 

So basically, I think I’m….

 

maturing.

Me: The Beacon of Maturity.

Says the girl who owns a DVD copy of High School Musical and talks about the consistency of her poops on a daily basis.

 

At the end of the day, I am happy to announce that I have officially returned to HeyPoofy.

 

At the same time If I don’t post anything else after this I’ll write to y’all in a year!!!!!!

 

-Poof

Not a Cliche Summer Recap Blog Post

I’ve honestly forgotten how to write a blog post.

I’ve been sitting here for a solid five minutes trying to figure out how I used to do this so effortlessly. Should I start with an interesting fact, a funny joke, or something just so totally random that you can’t help but say “OH POOF”.

After a while I realized something, I’ve already starting my post by talking about how I can’t start my post.

YES I’M BACK BABY.

A part of me wanted to write a blog post dedicated to all of the things that happened to me during my first summer in the lovely town of Ames, Iowa. Much to my surprise, there was a lot more to do here then watch corn grow.

i googled “iowa in the summer” and this was the first result.

Not to say that isn’t a good time.

So no, I am not going to talk about all of the people I met, the places I went, and the things I can not unsee. What I am going to talk about today is the things I missed out on.

The summer after freshman year is supposed to be the time where all of the freshman go back to their hometowns. They love it for the first few weeks. The clean showers, home cooked meals, and a bed that isn’t elevated eight feet off the ground? What’s not to love?

I will tell you what’s not to love, the complete and total lack of freedom. You don’t realize how much freedom you have in college until it is ripped away from you with the allure of spending your summer under the sun in the comfort of your hometown.

There is one thing however that really makes going home for the summer ok: seeing all of the friends you made growing up. Whether you choose to reconnect with your middle school best friend, or go to Perkins with your high school clique, these interactions are really important.

And I missed out on them.

It’s hard being in a different state and seeing all of your old friends hanging out again. It’s not even just that either. Reconnecting with people who you haven’t really seen in over a year can really show you how much you have grown as a person, or how much that person has changed too.

Recently I’ve even been finding myself nostalgically creeping on people who two years ago, I couldn’t imagine not seeing everyday. As if that was enough of an interaction to validate my thoughts.

If there’s one thing i’ve learned from this situation, my hometown might be needing an appearance from a certain curly haired mess sometime soon.

-Poof