The ABC’s To Get Degrees (Part 1)

Seeing that I have now been in college for a total of two and a half years, obviously I am the most intelligent twenty year old Iowa has ever seen. While choosing my adventure at Iowa State I have learned many things about myself and others here at this below average educational institution. However, out of all of the things that I have learned here at Iowa State, one thing stands out more than anything.

 

The alphabet.

this could be us but you’re playing.

A, B, C, and good ol’ D are just a few of the fantastic letters found in the English language as I have been told in college. Now, unlike the classic alphabet that I learned to love via song in preschool, the college alphabet is a bit different. Each of the twenty-six letters hold a different lesson that I have learned, now I will be sharing my knowledge with you all:

*disclaimer* When I started writing this post I thought that I would be able to analyze all of the letters of the alphabet in one post. I was wrong. I have a short attention span. You have a short attention spam. So I am splitting up these posts four letters at a time.

A – Acceptable Alcoholism: Unlike that Uncle or Aunt that was always drunk at family events that ultimately scared you for life when they started making out on top of the turkey or that time in high school you thought it was a good idea to mix a little bit of everything in your parents liquor cabinet until you started puking your guts out in your best friends toilet, alcohol was always an interesting, sort of taboo substance for me up until college. Once I got to college, everyone was drinking. In fact, I’ve noticed that it is more common to be intoxicated than it is to be sober; it’s even celebrated. Parties during weeknights, using alcohol as a way to express yourself, and bar specials during the week are some of the most common social interactions you experience in college. However, once you graduate it’s no longer a joke to say “LOL WOW I’M SUCH AN ALCOHOLIC LOL LOOK AT ME GOooOooOooO CHUG CHUG” it’s just sad and next thing you know you’re making out with someone on a turkey at your family’s Thanksgiving feast. Oh Aunty Poof you’re such a mess.

 

*disclaimer* If you are in college and don’t like alcohol and don’t like being drunk good for you. Honestly you probably will succeed in life a lot more than the rest of us.

 

B – Boners: Now ladies and gentlemen, boners are a very high form of praise and in a way they are also kind of funny. A word of advice, don’t laugh at a boner. Rumor has it the male will get insecure and the boner will go away and it will be a little awkward.

 

Or so I’ve heard.

 

C – Crying: My very first day at Iowa State two and a half years ago, I saw three separate people on campus crying. It wasn’t just tears either, they were having full on Britney Spears circa (more like circus amiright?) (cause she sings a song called circus…?) (get it….?) (i’m not funny why are you even reading this blog at all you must be really bored) 2007 meltdown. I remember thinking how odd that was. I hated crying at the time. I didn’t get it.

 

Two and a half years later, I understand them more than anyone. I don’t think there has been a week in the past year that I haven’t cried about something, mostly just because of all of the pent up feelings and repressed memories I’ve had for the majority of my life on top of all the stress that comes with college and living in your early twenties. In a way it’s kinda like puberty round two. I remember once over the summer I cried because I couldn’t eat a chicken strip.

 

A chicken strip.

 

I cried because of a chicken strip.

 

College.

 

D – Debt: An in state student? An out of state student? Scholarships? Loans? These are things that I thought would make a difference in the amount of money I would have to spend as a student. At the end of the day though, it really doesn’t matter. I don’t think I have met a single student at Iowa State paying for their own education who will not be graduating with some sort of debt. Let’s just say I’ve had about 1924723905239 rants about this since I even applied to college so I will save you all the five paragraph essay that my college education has taught me how to formulate for only 9,600 dollars a semester.

 

Obviously I’m not bitter.
No not at all.

Now you know your college A, B, C’s, next time won’t you cry with me.

Hello…It’s Me. (Adele Please Don’t Sue Me).

After looking through some of my old blog posts I noticed a common trend. The last few posts have begun with me apologizing for not writing as much as I used to in high school. Now, here’s the thing about college: there are a lot more things for me to do on a daily basis than when I was in high school. Some of these exciting college things include:

 

• Signing checks and paying bills.
• Experimenting with alcoholism.
• Crying.
• Going to class (at least thinking about going to class).
• Socializing…?
• Crying.
• Looking for big girl jobs upon graduation.
• School work.
• Work work.
• Crying at work.
• Working out.
• Dealing with crippling anxiety.
• Grocery shopping.

 

Now obviously, a lot of these things go hand and hand. What college student hasn’t just started crying randomly in the middle of class because they all of a sudden realize that their entire life has been structured by educational institutions since they entered preschool and in a few short years they will truly be on there own for the first time in their lives?

 

No?

 

Just me?

 

Yeah I’m not that surprised. Most of my meetings with my psychiatrist start with him asking me what the “problem of the month” is. As a side note is it sad that I am now on a first name basis with my psychiatrist? Actually no don’t answer that, let’s save the problem of the month for something more important.

 

In two days it will officially be one year since I have posted on this blog. Honestly I’m surprised I even remember the password. In the past year I’ve hit a lot of milestones, both good and bad, but important nonetheless. I’ve discovered a lot about myself both mentally and emotionally, I’m in the best physical shape I have been in in years, I experienced my first heartbreak, I’ve held down a job for almost two years now, and I’m learning that it’s ok that I won’t always know everything. I’ve realized that I can trust more people than I ever did before, and I’ve also realized that it’s ok to let people go even if you used to care about them more than anyone.

 

So basically, I think I’m….

 

maturing.

Me: The Beacon of Maturity.

Says the girl who owns a DVD copy of High School Musical and talks about the consistency of her poops on a daily basis.

 

At the end of the day, I am happy to announce that I have officially returned to HeyPoofy.

 

At the same time If I don’t post anything else after this I’ll write to y’all in a year!!!!!!

 

-Poof

Haikus From a Random Wednesday Morning

I could start this blog post with a list of excuses as to why I haven’t been writing. I could go on and on about how busy my schedule is, I could tell you a sob story about how my life is slowly falling apart, or I could tell you how my internet at my apartment only works every once and while. All of which are accurate, but they are also considerably irrelevant to your daily life. So here are some haikus instead:

wow blankets are warm
hmmmmmm can i just sleep all day?
wake up class starts soon

my alarm is ducks
QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK HONK QUACK
i must hate myself

class starts in twenty
not enough time to shower
i am a sex god

no frost today yes
i can just drive to my doom
i really love school

why is it still cold
my nip naps are unhappy
nippy nippy nap

thought i heard my name
*turns around to kid i hate*
*walks away faster*

why are we playing
jeopardy in class today
are we twelve like what

jeopardy makes me
really mad at the human
race. no nice things here

review sessions make
me feel like i know nothing
midterm here i come

hello library
how are you today? oh me?
i only cried once!!!!

I always try to
study at the library
but i never do

spotify is great
right now i’m listening to
disney music yes

pocahontas yes
JUST AROUND THE RIVER BEND
NOSTALGIC FEELINGS

preparing myself
for my adventure outside
someone hold me please

why are there balloons?????
balloons are so neat yes yes
fun plastic and air

SEE BALLOONS. THE INSTAGRAM FILTER IS NASHVILLE IF YOU WERE CURIOUS.

OH MY GOD BALLOONS
THEY ARE MAKING THEM RAIN AH
HOW BEAUTIFUL WOW

i found balloon friend
he is red and a nugget
*balloon pops in hands*

leftover perkins
this is all you have to say
to make me love you

yes i have HASHBROWNS
*cries on hashbrowns for more salt*
that’s so much better

-Poof

How to Prepare Yourself for Finals Week

The weather might be getting colder, but that is not stopping all of the sweat stained t-shirts being spotted on college campuses nationwide. The holiday season is fast approaching, a time to celebrate, avoid relatives, and eat excessive amounts of food and only feel mildly bad about it the next day. But as the holiday season grows closer, another event comes with it. An event that is far more stressful and terrifying than having to tell your aunts and uncles for the nineteenth year in a row that no, you are not in a relationship.

Obviously that hasn’t happened to me.

Obviously.

…

Anyway I’m talking about Finals Week.

This picture gives me life. 10/10.

In college, Finals Week is the breaking point. It’s your last chance in the semester to save your grade in one, two, or maybe even all of your classes. There is blood, sweat, and mostly tears shed throughout the duration of this week every semester. College students nationwide desperately cram in an attempt to learn everything they didn’t learn in class because they were too busy taking Buzzfeed quizzes in class, sacrificing the sleep that they need in order to appropriately function in society.

But this isn’t society, this is college.

You’ll sleep when you graduate and pay off all of your student loans.

Or when you’re dead. Whichever one happens first.

To help make this semester’s Finals Week a little bit more bearable, here are some tips to get you through this life scaring, traumatizing week:

1. Study in Advance

If you take the time to study the few weeks prior to Finals Week, it will be substantially less stressful for you. This way, you can break up all of the chapters you need to review so you don’t have to do them all at once. Who knows, you might actually learn something neat.

2. Plan Out Your Week

Nothing says stress like a busy schedule! By planning out when and where all of your finals are, you will be able to sleep a lot better at night.

3. Get a lot of Sleep
Speaking of sleep, make sure you get plenty of sleep during Finals Week and the weeks before it. Strive to get at least eight hours of sleep a night. It might be difficult at first, but trust me it will be worth it.

4. Become a Successful Drug Dealer

Another thing that causes a lot of people stress during Finals Week are financial burdens. In order to study more, you are more likely than not going to have to cut back on your hours at your part time job. However, as a successful drug dealer you will never have to worry about cutting back your hours at your job, your job is a part of you now. So just sit back and relax as the greens come in, and the greens go out.

5. Join a Violent Gang

If studying becomes too much to handle, join a gang! These crafty men and women will make sure that you get A’s on all of your finals. If a few people are hurt in the process, don’t worry! It’s probably not even your fault.

Probably.

6. Enter the Witness Protection Program

Next thing you know, your name is Susan Winters and you have cut off all of your glorious hair while you are being forced onto a shady aircraft taking you to an unknown, but safe location. Don’t worry, the finals can’t touch you now Susan.

7. Cry.

This is probably going to happen either way. Mental breakdowns are quite common during Finals Week. Succumb to the pain. Let the tears overtake you until your professors are drowning in your sorrows. No finals are distributed due to floods. You did it. You’re a hero. You are a beacon of light after a deadly storm. Just like Hilary Duff once said, “Let the rain fall down, and wake my dreams”, let those tears fall down. Do it for Hilary.

I hope these tips help make your Finals Weeks a little bit more bearable, I know I’m going to follow every single one of these tips because that’s the only way I’m going to survive.

Well maybe not all of them.

I don’t sleep very much.

-Poof

Welcome to Womanhood, Here’s Twenty Bucks.

Fall of 2006. The smell of axe body spray and acne medicine filled the room. Well that, but also a hint of insecurity and self doubt too. Thirty to forty sweaty, pre pubescent teens were crammed into a room with each other against their own will, not sure which horror they would be exposed to today.

That’s right I’m talking about my first middle school health class.

It was my first class of the day, bright and early at eight in the morning. Honestly, I can’t think of a better time of the day to tell eleven year olds all about reproductive health and where babies come from.

This morning was different than the other mornings. I had been feeling gross all week, but on this particular day I was convinced I was dying.

“Mom, I really don’t feel good can I stay home?” I asked with pleading eyes.

“WHAT ABOUT YOUR FUTURE? COLLEGE IS RIGHT AROUND THE CORNER” my mother proclaimed.

Keep in mind this was in sixth grade. My mother has such a way with words.

I hobbled into the classroom, and fell into the first seat that was open.

“Alrighty class today we are going to talk about the menstrual cycle!”

A few kids in the class snickered, but everyone for the most part just looked confused. Confused, and uncomfortable. To be fair, when you are in middle school there is a nine out of ten chance that you look uncomfortable for no real reason.

But all of the sudden I had a reason: I just peed my pants.

“CAN I GO TO THE BATHROOM??” I exclaimed as I already launched myself out of my seat.

I ran to the first bathroom I could find and locked myself in the stall to analysis the entire situation. I figured the first thing I should do would be to get rid of the urine stained khols underwear. I swiftly took of my pants off and screamed.

I was peeing blood.

I started crying in the bathroom stall, thinking about who I should leave all of belongings too because obviously, I was dying. My life began to flash before my eyes, and for some reason Hannah Montanna made a few to many appearances during my reflection. I pulled myself together and told myself, you don’t deserve to die in a bathroom stall in hell.

At least die in a classroom in hell.

I somberly walked toward my desk. Tears staining my cheeks, and blood staining my other cheeks.

“…Women go through this once a month. It’s called a period…” my teacher explained in a bit too excited tone of voice. She began scrolling through slides of what a period was when it hit me: I wasn’t going to die.

I was just a woman now.

Apparently.

The school day finally ended and the bus took me back to my neighborhood. I rushed into the kitchen to tell my mother that I was now a woman.

“MOM I’M HAVING A MENSTRUAL CYCLE.”

“QUITE I’M ON THE PHONE.”

“BUT MOM. PERIOD.”

“…there are pads upstairs…”

I was a little disappointed that she wasn’t as excited as I was, but it wasn’t a big deal. It was something I didn’t want the whole world knowing anyway.

A few days later there was a letter at the kitchen table with my name on it. Estatic, I quickly grabbed the letter to see who it was from. Mrs. Welsch. My third grade teacher.

“Ahh…mom…why did Mrs. Welsch send me a letter?”

“I’m not sure! Open it!”

I cautiously opened up the letter not sure what to expect. Inside I found a novel. What started as an innocent Hallmark card saying in big bold letters “CONGRATULATIONS!” on the front, turned into a fear I never knew I had. Mrs. Welsch had written me a three page essay welcoming me to womanhood.

Promotion. Promotion to womanhood that is.

My third grade teacher. Mrs. Welsch.

Third. Grade.

“Mom…”

“What?” she said far too innocently.

“Mom…did you tell Mrs. Welsch, my third grade teacher, that I got my period…?” I big part of me wanted to believe that my mother wouldn’t go around telling people that I was on my period. A part of me wanted to believe that Mrs. Welsch was actually the period fairy or something and that’s how she knew.

“Yeah I did! It just kind of came up!” she said as she walked out of the room.

I stood there unsure of what to do, when something fell out of the envelope. It was a twenty dollar bill with a note that said:

“We all know how awful periods can be, take this money and go buy yourself something to celebrate becoming a woman! Maybe some makeup!”

I’m pretty sure I bought pokemon cards.

-Poof

Not a Cliche Summer Recap Blog Post

I’ve honestly forgotten how to write a blog post.

I’ve been sitting here for a solid five minutes trying to figure out how I used to do this so effortlessly. Should I start with an interesting fact, a funny joke, or something just so totally random that you can’t help but say “OH POOF”.

After a while I realized something, I’ve already starting my post by talking about how I can’t start my post.

YES I’M BACK BABY.

A part of me wanted to write a blog post dedicated to all of the things that happened to me during my first summer in the lovely town of Ames, Iowa. Much to my surprise, there was a lot more to do here then watch corn grow.

i googled “iowa in the summer” and this was the first result.

Not to say that isn’t a good time.

So no, I am not going to talk about all of the people I met, the places I went, and the things I can not unsee. What I am going to talk about today is the things I missed out on.

The summer after freshman year is supposed to be the time where all of the freshman go back to their hometowns. They love it for the first few weeks. The clean showers, home cooked meals, and a bed that isn’t elevated eight feet off the ground? What’s not to love?

I will tell you what’s not to love, the complete and total lack of freedom. You don’t realize how much freedom you have in college until it is ripped away from you with the allure of spending your summer under the sun in the comfort of your hometown.

There is one thing however that really makes going home for the summer ok: seeing all of the friends you made growing up. Whether you choose to reconnect with your middle school best friend, or go to Perkins with your high school clique, these interactions are really important.

And I missed out on them.

It’s hard being in a different state and seeing all of your old friends hanging out again. It’s not even just that either. Reconnecting with people who you haven’t really seen in over a year can really show you how much you have grown as a person, or how much that person has changed too.

Recently I’ve even been finding myself nostalgically creeping on people who two years ago, I couldn’t imagine not seeing everyday. As if that was enough of an interaction to validate my thoughts.

If there’s one thing i’ve learned from this situation, my hometown might be needing an appearance from a certain curly haired mess sometime soon.

-Poof

Bad First Impression? Or Funny Story.

First impressions are weird.

 

Especially when end up having a good relationship with the person.

 

Typically first impressions are a mutual experience between two people. Usually, it is the first time that two people meet but what happens when one person gets to have their first impression before the other person?

 

When reflecting nostalgically with my friends, they usually say that their first impression of me was either my hair consuming their interest like a black hole, or my naturally loud voice that can be heard throughout any building that I am in. Unfortunately, only one of those statements is an over exaggeration.

 

About three weeks ago, I lost one of my favorite bosses at one of my jobs to a better place. Don’t worry, she isn’t dead, if anything she has found more life after leaving the depressing atmosphere of her former job. We found ourselves sitting back a talking during a slower part of the shift:

 

“I hope you know that you were on of my favorite bosses here.” I said while removing a glob of nacho cheese from the white counter top.

i swear this stuff was everywhere and i’m still pretty upset about it

 

“Oh don’t worry I know. No one else will put up with your shit.” she smirked while shaking her head.

 

“Hey now I could have been a lot worse!”

 

“Oh yeah! I know that! I remember you from orientation!”

 

I paused and thought back to the orientation that had taken place almost a year ago. It was hot, really hot. I remember being able to hear my hair getting bigger and bigger by the minute that day. Dripping in sweat I made my way to the Memorial Union where I was given a tour of the food court and received my uniform. It didn’t take more than fifteen minutes but still in that time I did not remember seeing my boss once.

 

“You were sure a sight that day!” She said while still laughing bringing me back into reality “I couldn’t forget you.”

 

“I’m confused.”

 

“Do you want me to tell you why I remembered you?”

 

“It was my hair wasn’t it.”

 

“Oh no, that was a sight too I suppose.”

 

“…ok fine tell me how did you remember me?”

 

“You had a HUGE hickey on your neck.”

 

The flashback returned this time focusing in on my neck. The makeup I had put on it didn’t last more than five minutes because of how much I was sweating. And this hickey was HUGE. It was a dark purple, almost black and was outlined with a dark red color and my shame. What didn’t help my situation was that I had only been in Ames for three days by the time I had orientation.

 

I turned to my boss, jaw dropped with pain in my eyes. I always have something to say, but that comment left me speechless.

 

“It’s ok, you came back from your first impression.” she said as she walked out of the room leaving me quiet and alone.

 

She got to have her first impression of me a solid week before I even knew what she looked like. Let alone what her name was. It’s funny how that works out sometimes, because even though at first she saw only one side of me, all of the other sides were soon discovered. Taking her first impression and making it laughable rather than slightly shameful.

 

What can you learn from this? One thing is a bad first impression isn’t the worst thing that can happen to you in the workplace, you just have to show that you are more than that first sample of you.

 

Another thing is if you have a huge hickey in the summer you should buy waterproof makeup.

 

-Poof

 

I’m Not an Adult

Ahh summer, here at last. Time to relax, find a way to darken my pasty complexion, and have crazy adventures with my closest friends because after all: summer time is for the memories.

does iowa even have beaches i’m not actually sure?????

Or at least, that’s how it used to be.

 

That was always my mentality for my summers. It was a time to not worry, not think, just create memories that I would reflect on nostalgically during the colder months of the year. In summer there weren’t any repercussions for any of the odd, awkward, and sometimes sketchy situations I found myself in. It was all in good fun, after all we were just kids. To be fair, a lot of my friends are fortunate enough to still have this summer to be reckless.

 

I however, decided to give the ‘adult’ world a try.

 

To clarify, I do not consider myself an adult and I don’t think I will for a long time. However, this past week has really shown me that I am older than I thought I was. I have done more adult like tasks in the past week than I have in all of 2014.

 

What have I done you ask? WELL LET ME ENLIGHTEN YOU:

 

• I went to a farmers market.
• I moved.
• Other adult like things.
• I signed a sublease.
• I set up the utilities for the house I am staying in this summer under my own name because you know water in important.
• I went grocery shopping.
• I had an interview.
• Other adult like things.
• I worked over thirty hours.
• I did laundry.
• I went to bed every night before 1 am. Ok for me this is a new kind of miracle you don’t even understand.
• Other adult like things.
• I was offered a second job and began my training for that.
• I created an agenda for my entire summer.
• I shipped a package through FedEx.
• ….
• AND OTHER ADULT LIKE THINGS.

 

Just reading over all of these things makes me feel really old. Will this be a summer with no surprises? No late night heart to hearts with close friends? No waking up after noon every day?

 

Who knows.

 

Maybe my summer will become a surprising one afterall.

 

#PoofProblems

-Poof

Happy Blog-iversary To Me.

A little over a year ago was the beginning, the beginning of a force so powerful that no one could have seen it coming. People all over the internet surfed away from their mundane social media websites to view the start of a new era: the birth of HeyPoofy.wordpress.com.

 

Wow writing that down not only makes me look pretentious, but it also makes me look incredibly insignificant.

 

Classic.

 

Anyway so I was thinking how I should celebrate this past year of awkward situations, cool stories, and mental breakdowns in one blog post. Then it hit me.

 

I have never actually written an about me post.

 

You all have been following this blog for over a year now and some of you don’t know any basic facts about me. Well, aside from the fact that I have uncontrollable hair and I enjoy burning poptarts in the senior foods room.

 

So every year I am going to acquire random questions from my peers and followers, and I will pick the most awkward, uncomfortable, insightful, and just plain weird questions and answer them here. So without any more hesitation, let me introduce myself:

 

Emily D: When and where was the first time you gargled a liquid, and why did you decide to do it at that time?

 

The first time I remember gargling a liquid, that I remember at least was probably when I was six or seven. My dad was running late for work when I walked by his door as he frantically took a swig of mouthwash.

“Dad what’s that?” I stated as my dad swiftly gargled the mouthwash and spit it out in the sink.

 

“Oh it’s just something that will make sure that people will talk to me at work, have a good day!”

 

He dropped the mouthwash on the counter and hustled out the door. For the majority of my young life, and lets face it still today, I have always had trouble interacting with other people. When my dad said that this so called magical drink helped him talk to people at work, I couldn’t help but stare at it with complete adoration. I snatched up the mysterious drink and took a swig just like my father did. I gargled and gargled but I didn’t feel any more socially acceptable.

 

But then it hit me.

 

The incredible burning sensation from the alcoholic mouthwash overcame me with a powerful punch. I continued to gargle until I felt tears stream down my face. Soon, mouthwash began to spew from my little mouth until all of the mouthwash was on my dads bathroom floor. The minty smell attracted my mother to the source of my mess with a disappointed look on her face.

 

So needless to say I didn’t try gargling mouthwash for a few more years.

 

Mitch B: What is your favorite kind of textile?

 

What.

 

Mitch B: What kind of people are you afraid of or uncomfortable around?

 

Well I wouldn’t say that I am afraid of any type of person…

 

…but I am terrified of people that are adults still in their awkward middle school phase.

I’m not uncomfortable around middle schoolers though, because I understand. I understand that it is just a phase, we have all been there. We all have woken up some morning looked at ourselves in the mirror and thought, “since when did I own Hollister pajamas?” or “My eye liner literally looks like a raccoon. Oh and it doesn’t even match my…bright blue…eye shadow”.

 

I was even fine with it in high school when I smelled out the Ax body spray in the hallways and saw the extreme teenage angst exhibited on some peoples faces. It was ok. We were still kids. They had time to figure it out before going to college or starting their lives.

 

But when I see kids on my college campus who give me flashbacks to middle school, I can not even give these people eye contact because of how terrified I am of having a middle school flashback.

 

If you have never experienced one of these flashbacks, consider yourself lucky because it a nostalgia that no one can enjoy.

 

No one.

 

Andie C: When was the last time you drank a glass of milk?

 

Wednesday April 16, 2014 at 5:42 pm. I also had a snicker-doodle cookie if you were curious.

 

Angie H: The most normal thing about you?

 

This question actually took me a while to figure out. It turns out I am actually a pretty abnormal person. I would have to say that the most normal things about me is that I brush my teeth twice a day. Once when I wake up and once before I go to bed.

 

Wow I’m such a catch, hit me up boys I’m single.

 

On a more serious note I would like to thank each and everyone of you for sticking with me the past year. Writing is something I truly enjoy and I really appreciate all of your support. I hope you all stick around for another year of “poof problems”.

 

Less than three.

-Poof

A Collaboration of Random Thoughts

Hello there everyone! So…its been awhile. I could give you a list of excuses for why I haven’t been writing but quite frankly, I don’t have a valid excuse.

Because I have been writing.

I just haven’t been writing anything that any of you would be interested in. True, I’m just kind of assuming that none of you want to read my five page rhetorical analysis on an irrelevant article I had to read, but if i’m wrong I am so sorry.

Anyway, so I haven’t had a lot of time to sit down and write an actual “life update” type of blog post. Every time I have tried to sit down and actually blog I get distracted and forget who I am, where I am, what my purpose in life is, and most importantly what I was writing about.

So here is a random combination of thoughts and poems that I have wrote in the past few weeks, I hope you enjoy:

Words:

Words. Words are really weird. They are just a bunch of combined letters mashed together to express a thought, an idea, or a feeling. Then to make them more complicated, the words work together to form sentences, sentences that can invoke change if anyone actually listens. From rants to lectures, from speeches to slurs, from books to blog posts, words impact humans everyday.

But how can something so small cause so much change?

Even simple words like “Yes” and “No” can alter a whole situation. Words shift how people feel. Words can break hearts and mend them all at the same time. Nothing is more powerful or credible than a person’s word. Common phrases like

“I love you” or

“I need you”

make people think.

The trite phrase “actions speak louder than words” is lost in our generation. Words are honest, words are raw. Words can be analysed and recorded for years, an action happens in a moment.

Even just the sounds of certain words can make people cringe. If a sound of a word can make you think, what does that mean?

It shows how powerful words really are. Some say it’s crazy to think that a seemingly random combination of letters, can actually mean something. A lot of different somethings.

Words.

Words are weird.

I call this:

“that one time I was really determined to write a blog post but then i just fell asleep on my keyboard instead”

*dusts off the old keyboard* Hello there everyone! Guess who is back at college for her second semester? If you guessed me, well then you are correct! If you didn’t guess me, well then you made this lackluster blog opening a little bit more pointless. safff ffffffffffffffffff fffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff fffffffffffffnjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa   aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa    aa    aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

DISCLAIMER: it went on like that for a solid seven pages until I woke up to the song “Let it Go” playing, while I observed my newly drool stained keyboard. If that wasn’t a sign to stop writing, I don’t know what is.

Haiku’s from January 21st, 2014

Backstory: At this point in January, I wanted to start a new segment here where I just wrote a bunch of haikus relating to my whole day. If you like this, please tell me in the comments or on HeyPoofy’s Facebook page.

AND NOW FOR SOME HAIKUS:

it is too early

no other student is up

why must i work sigh

i’m sure it’s not cold

*opens the door* HOLY TITS

COLD COLD COLD CRYING

MY TEARS ARE FREEZING

I THINK I’M THE ONLY ONE

OUT HERE. WHY CRUEL WORLD.

remember how I

scoop eggs for a living wow

this is kinda sad

my boss is cranky

serving breakfast with anger

not worth the money

calM dOwN We HAvE BreAd

BUT WE do NOT hAvE BaCoN

sigh SIGH sigh SIGH sigh

remember when I

through my gloves into the trash

then strutted away?

huzzah warm showers

wait…why is the water cold

*bathes in tears instead*

one time my roommate

and her mom came in the room

when i was naked

ha ha ha ha ha

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

ha…ha ha ha ha

At least I can say I posted something *self five*

-Poof